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超级搞笑的英语笑话欣赏

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英语笑话是一种重要的交际手段,在人们的日常生活中起着重要作用,既能让人放松身心,又能拉近彼此距离。本文是超级搞笑的英语笑话,希望对大家有帮助!

超级搞笑的英语笑话欣赏
  超级搞笑的英语笑话:This is marriage all about

My wife-to-be and I were at the county clerk's office for our marriage license. After recording the vital information — names, dates of birth, etc. — the clerk handed me our license and deadpanned, "No refunds, no exchanges, no warranties."

婚姻就是这么一回事

我和未婚妻在县办公室领结婚证。在记录完重要信息——名字,出生日期,等后——办事员递给我结婚证,脸无表情地说,“不退钱,不包换,不保修。”

  超级搞笑的英语笑话:承诺的结果

Father: I promised to buy you a car if you passed your examination, and you have failed. Whatwere you doing last term?

父亲:我曾向你许诺,如果你考试及格就给你买俩小汽车,可你却未能做到。你上学期一直在干什么呀?

Son: I was learning to drive a car.

儿子:我在学开汽车。

  超级搞笑的英语笑话:你爸爸帮你做作业了吗?

One day, Tim's mathematics teacher looked at his homework and saw that he had got all hissums right.

一天,蒂姆的数学老师看了他的作业,发现他全做对了。

The teacher was very pleased and rather surprised.

老师很高兴,同时也十分惊讶。

He called Tim to his desk and said to him, "You got all your homework right this time, Tim. Whathappened? Did your father help you?"

他把蒂姆叫到桌前说:"蒂姆,你这次的作业全都做对了,怎么回事?你爸爸帮你做了吗?"

"No, sir. He was too busy last night, so I had to do it all myself," said Tim."

"不,先生,我爸爸昨天很忙,我不得不全由自己做。"

  超级搞笑的英语笑话:什么都有,你要买什么?

A store manager heard a clerk tell a customer. No, ma'am, we haven't had any for a while, and itdoesn't look as if we'll be getting soon.

一个商店经理听见一个店员对顾客说:不,夫人,这会儿没有,一时半会儿看来也不会有。

Horrified, the manager came runningover to the customer and said, Of course, we'll havesomesoon, we placed an order last week.

经理惊恐万分地跑到顾客跟前说:当然,马上就会有的。我们上周订了货。

Then the manager drew the clerk aside: Never, never, never say we are out of anything saywe've got it on order and it's what was it she wanted?

然后经理把店员拉到一边:千万,千万,千万不要说我们没有什么,说我们已经订了货,货马上就到。现在你说她要买什么?

Rain, said the clerk.

雨,店员说。

  超级搞笑的英语笑话:好孩子 Good Boy!

Little Robert asked his mother for two cents.

小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。

"What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"

“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”

"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.

“我给了一个可怜的老太婆,”他回答说。

"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly.

“你真是个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说。

"Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"

“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?”

"She is the one who sells the candy."

“她是个卖糖果的。”


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