自恋者的10个双重标准(上)

People with narcissistic personality disorder or a narcissistic style feel entitled to act however they want. Yet, they often deny others that same freedom. Those double standards can make it disturbing and exhausting to be around someone with unhealthy narcissistic tendencies.

自恋群体会认为自己天生就该出风头，却不希望别人拥有在人前闪耀的自由。然而，这种双重标准使得有自恋人格倾向者周边的亲友感到烦恼和疲惫。

If you have to deal with narcissists, it is helpful to recognize 10 double standards they hold. People with unhealthy narcissism tend to be:

如果你不得不和这类人打交道，那么以下10种自恋人格所持有的双重标准，对你会有所帮助。

1. Outwardly charming but hellish at home.

1.对外乐观迷人，私下阴郁不已

Like a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, they may be magnanimous to outsiders. But when they come home, they can become demeaning, bullying, and selfish in ways they don’t show in public.

例如，变身怪医和海德先生一样，他们对外形象大度善良，高尚无私。但一回到家里，就会显示出在外隐藏的性格，刻薄，霸道又自私。

2. Thin-skinned but thick-headed.

2. 敏感又顽固

People with narcissism may pout when they are not the center of attention or rage at the tiniest slight. But when you have needs or hurt feelings, they may ignore your feelings or criticize you for being "needy" or "too sensitive".

如果自恋人格者没有成为众人的中心，或是受到一丁点儿怠慢，也许会撅嘴不满或愤怒，但是，如果当你需要重视或是感情受伤时， 他们也许会忽视你的感受，责怪你有点神经过敏，太矫情。

3. Obsessed with their image yet undermining of yours.

3. 纠结自己的形象但却挖苦你的

They may exaggerate their achievements and talents, telling whoppers that they appear to fully believe. But as much as they inflate their image, they undercut yours.

他们也许会夸大自己的成就和天赋，也会相信自己撒下的弥天大谎，但是当他们极度地膨胀自我的时候，对你却两笔带过。

They may undermine your confidence by second-guessing your decisions. When it is your turn to shine, they may ignore your success, spoil your big moment with a tantrum, or take credit for your accomplishments.

他们会通过提前预判你的决定来打击你的自信心，当你光芒万丈的时候，他们会忽略你的成功，在你的精彩时刻黑脸相向或傲气居功。

4. Reputation-conscious but superficial.

4. 在乎自己的名声，但待人欠真诚

Some narcissists may be obsessed with traveling in the "right" social circles and fixated on others’ opinions of them. Yet, their relationships are often superficial, lacking authenticity and reciprocity. Many narcissists go through life without having a close friend. If you depend on a narcissist to be there when you most need them, you are likely to be disappointed.

一些自恋者群体总会被束缚在自己的“正确的社交圈子”，并且很是看重别人对自己的看法。然而他们与别人的关系往往是肤浅的，缺少真实牢靠和互惠的朋友关系。因此，很多自恋人格的人终其一生也没有亲密的朋友。当你想依赖自恋人格的朋友时，他们可能会让你失望。

5. Grandiose but fragile.

5. 外强中干

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牛油果含有丰富的蛋白质、矿物质与维生素E和维生素C，还有钾、纤维与健康的脂肪。这些营养物质有助于保持神经和大脑的健康，从而控制压力荷尔蒙。每天吃一颗牛油果可以有效降低血压与压力荷尔蒙。你也可以把牛油果加到你最喜欢的饮料或水果沙拉中。要想得到最佳效果，最好是吃新鲜的牛油果而不是包装好的加工品。